At least there’s always Monty Python when you’re having a rough day:

Son: Ah…ah know. But I want the girl that I marry to have… a
certain…*special*…something…
King: Cut that out!! Cut that out….

You’re marryin’ Princess Lucky, so you’d better get used to the idea!

GUARDS!!!
Make sure the prince doesn’t leave this room until I come and get ‘im.

Guard 1: Not to leave the room, even if you come and get ‘im.
Guard 2: *Hic*
King: Nono…. *Until* I come and get him.
Guard 1: Until you come and get him, we’re not to enter the room.
King: Nono, no… You *stay* in the room, and make sure *he*
doesn’t leave.
Guard 1: And you’ll come and get him.
Guard 2: *Hic*
King: Right.
Guard 1: We don’t need to do anything, apart from just stop him, entering the
room.
King: Nono. *Leaving* the room.
Guard 1: Leaving the room, yes.
King: All right?
Guard 1: ‘Right.
King: Right.
Guard 1: Oh! If if if uhhhh…. if if uhhhhh…. If if if we……
King: Yes, what is it?
Guard 1: Oh. I-if……. Oh….
King: Look, it’s quite simple.
Guard 1: Uh…..
King: You just stay here, and make sure ‘e doesn’t leave the room.
All right?
Guard 2: *hic*
Guard 1: Oh, I remember! Uhhhh, can he leave the room with us?
King: No…nono, no. You just keep him in ‘ere, and make sure…
Guard 1: Oh yes, we’ll keep him in here, obviously, but if he *had*
to leave, and we *were* with him…
King: nononono just KEEP HIM IN HERE
Guard 1: …Until you or anyone else…
King: No, not anyone else, just me…
Guard 1: …Just you…
Guard 2: *hic*
King: Get back.
Guard 1: Get back.
King: All right?
Guard 1: Right, we’ll stay here until you get back.
Guard 2: *hic*
King: And, uh… make sure ‘e doesn’t leave.
Guard 1: What?
King: Make sure ‘e doesn’t leave!
Guard 1: The prince??????
King: Yes, MAKE SURE ‘E DOESN’T LEAVE…
Guard 2: *hic*
Guard 1: Oh, yes, of course!! I thought you meant him! You know, it seemed a bit daft me having to guard
him when ‘e’s a guard…
King: Is that clear?
Guard 1: Oh, quite clear, no problems!
Guard 2: *hic*
King: Right.
Where are *you* going?
Guard 1: We’re coming with you!
King: Nono, I want you to *stay* here and MAKE SURE ‘E DOESN’T LEAVE!
Guard 1: Oh, I see, right!
Son: but father…
King: Shut your noise, you! And get that suit on.

AND NO SINGING!
Guard 2: *hic*
King: Oh, go and get a glass of water. (leaves)